A List Of Things To Not Do
Please don’t pick up the pencils I drop to the floor.
Don’t pull my chairs for me.
Don’t open doors.
Don’t make me laugh or smile,
Don’t make me feel too nice.
I won’t know what to do when you are not around anymore.
Don’t say anything that will make you even slightly memorable,
In a sea of faceless strangers I would rather you were a fable.
I don’t want you to see the teeth under my eyelashes,
Talons on the insides of my cheeks,
The pebbles in the space above my throat.
My many rotting cavities.
Don’t ask me out to dance today,
Tomorrow, you will watch me mouth goodbye
from seven streets away.
I will trap the ghosts of my screams inside your ears.
Even as you look into my eyes,
and we continue to sway.
I will overthink constantly.
Quietly at first,
And then out loud.
Over and over and over and over
and over and over again,
Until you feel
The worms in my mind
Devouring your brain.
You will be on first name basis
with the voices in my head.
You will have to accept the fact
that they follow me into bed.
You will have to watch me scratch at my walls
Scratch up against your eyeballs.
Don’t hand me your heart, love
It might slip and fall
From my hands,
I never expect you to understand.
You seem like a decent person
And you might want to stay.
But I just don’t think I have it in me,
To see the look of disgust on your face
While you chew your fries,
And I bite into my own flesh.
Trust me you don’t want this, love
You shouldn’t want me anyway
I won’t let you touch me
But I will make sure your fingers
Are always 2 centimeters away
If I start to talk now I won’t know to stop
I will nibble at your earlobe
I will bite it off
I will pull you down into my carnival of strife
You deserve so much more than this life.
I will make you hate me.
Then run into a red light.
Just to watch you follow me
Face contorted with panic
I cannot follow the instructions
You read on the box I came in
Trust me I’ve tried.
So before its to late,
You might want to run for your life.
Expired milk and dusty cereal.
That’s what we will eat.
If you stick around for breakfast,
I will try my best to be sweet.
In a few days I will fail.
I will send you packages in the mail.
Containing organs I stole from you,
When I thought you weren’t looking
And you thought you wouldn’t fail
At fixing me.
Please don’t pick up the pencils I drop to the floor