This week has been filming week for me. In addition to this project, looming deadlines for all my finals have made everything chaotic, but I find that I’ve gotten more work done during the day so I can take my time making the videos and making sure I’ve painted my face as best I can. While filming Ethan, which is the second video in the series, I started crying out of nowhere. I’ve decided to dedicate each video to someone I wanted to date in High School. Because of the exploratory and emotional parts of my project, I decided to look inwards and backwards at my past to figure out who I am and why I’m attracted to anyone who gives me attention. I think that might be sad. Am I sad? That’s just another way of getting to my thesis.
I’ve been able to experiment with the way I do my makeup, the first video, John, has a relatively simple makeup style, still heavily inspired by drag, but still subdued. I’ve had to work around some snafus- I wanted plain backgrounds initially, but now I’ve opted for industrial/residential settings and intimate places in order to bring the message further.
I love that wedding dress and I literally could not bring myself to destroy it, so I thought about what the implications of a tattered dress would be, and decided to not do it.