This is an installation that tells the story about my experience and reactions (both mentally and physically) to the very first time that an important family member—my grandpa died when I was still a child. I always remember how I laughed at the funeral and how I cried so hard when I realized what a funeral is. It means grandpa is no longer a visible, touchable being that can be around; it means the good old time is gone and all these memories will eventually fade away as I grow.

This incident opens the gateway to death for me. As a result, I use colorful acrylic boards to create the “pathway.” Blue, red, and yellow result different color when viewers look at it from a different angle, just like how I gained different thoughts about this incident whenever I try to relive it—first is confused, later is regret, and now is embraced it. Collage, as well, represents my mixed feeling, and the abstracted painting of my grandpa means his image has faded in my mind. And the resin add sense of heaviness into the installation which stands for the importance of this incident to me, as well as hint the crazy amount of tears I’ve cried.

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