Viral Food is Disgusting

I began writing this with an intention that seems to be common in most food writers who try and attack the idea of “viral food.”  Many blog posts and food reviews I have read tend to beg the question, “how is viral food possible?”  Living in NYC, a place that is both one of the biggest food hubs of the world, and simultaneously one of the trendiest places out there, I feel like I could take a stab at the world of trendy foods (even if I don’t partake in eating them).  But as I began writing out my curiosities among how food trends came to be, I scrapped my writing, because it seems so uninteresting.  If you think about it, it’s perfectly possible that food can become viral, because we’ve seen that “being viral” isn’t so unthinkable after all.  After we accept that the internet and all its craziness is a thing that exists, we can realize that virality is just the internet’s way of expressing a common interest.  Popularity!  “Going viral” is just something online that trends.  And, since everyone has access to everything nowadays, whatever looks the prettiest or most unique simply gets looked at (and probably copied) by millions of people. If you really think about it, this system seems like the perfect one for food, something that humans have always had a natural affinity and devotion to.  

So, instead of cheaply wondering how is this possible? I’ll skip ahead and just critique the idea  of viral food by saying its gross.  Every food trend I have seen looks gross. Like a terribly unpalatable thing to put inside one’s mouth.  Food culture has advanced so greatly, and I would even say with the help of online virality.  But doesn’t this mean food should be tastier? In most cases yes, but in more cases, somehow, no.  

Here are some of the words viral food trends: 

1. Combining food items: Sushi Burritos, Cheesy Taco Pasta, Pizza stuffed Burgers…They can all go straight to the trash.  I feel like I can occasionally let the meshing of cultures slide, such as dashing a little Sriracha on your bacon/egg/cheese,  but I’ve seen this step taken way too far. There is this stoner mentality that two cravings combined creates the ultimate delight, however this couldn’t be farther from the truth. Leave cravings be.  Separate but equal mentality can work here. No Guacamole stuffed Onion rings.  
2. Rainbow stuff: Making something colorful does not make something delicious.  In my opinion, it literally sucks the deliciousness out of the food item.  “Unicorn colors” is a trend, but what is even crazier than that alone, is the fact that it is seeping into savory dishes.  Colors like blue, purple, and pink are already unnatural, so we usually associate them with sugary, processed desserts like cotton candy or ice cream.  A rainbow bagel with scallion cream cheese, is however, blasphemous.

Instead of a third pick, I’ll rapidfire name a few shocking crowd favorites:
Huge stuff like jumbo burgers and a lb. glob of cheese over a plate of food, jiggly pancakes, microbreweries, cookie dough raw? Savory stuff that isn’t supposed to be savory like corn ice cream, food with weed in it, gold flakes, massive pizza slices with anything from tacos to pasta to chicken wings used as toppings, purple food, “show-stopping” sundaes, and pitch black food items such as ice cream and water.