It was mid-February and brisk outside. The kind of brisk where the air is so crisp that each breath you take fills your lungs with fresh adrenaline. There was not a cloud in sight, the sky was so blue it almost hurt to look at. Amagansett is beautiful in the winter, it’s quiet and peaceful. No tourists, no beaches filled with so many colorful umbrellas that you can hardly see the sand. I couldn’t help but smile, I felt lucky to be witnessing such beauty. It was morning, and I was with my boyfriend Jonny. Hot coffee’s in our hand, we drove to the beach, admiring everything in view. When we got there, we stood and looked at the ocean. It’s dark blue waves crashing hard, causing a chilly salty spray to land on our cheeks. Maybe it was the overwhelming feeling of happiness, or maybe it was too beautiful to just look at, but we decided we were going in. Before we had time to change our minds, we ripped off our clothes until we were bare and exposed. We ran through the sand and into the water. There’s a moment right before your body hits the water, of pure unknowingness and fear. Why am I jumping into freezing cold water in the middle of the winter?    What the hell am I doing? But in I went. The icy water enveloping my body, my face, my hair. I resurface and look at Jonny. I think then the reality of it all truly hit us, and we ran out, teeth chattering and bodies shivering. We wrap ourselves in towels and get close, trying to warm ourselves as much as possible. We reunite with our hot coffee’s and laugh. We drove home thinking of steaming hot showers.

That night I fell asleep to the sound of the waves, comfy and cozy underneath layers of sheets and blankets. It’s rare for me, to feel pure happiness and pure happiness only, but I can easily say that I went to bed with a big smile planted on my face.

When you were little, you were often called a tom-boy. You were chubby, wore baggy clothes, and liked to play sports. You were envious of your older sister’s looks, her femininity, her group of friends. You didn’t see anything wrong or different with how you dressed and to be honest- you weren’t held back by what people thought. Your parents told you that you were beautiful, you were good at most things you did, and you ultimately had a carefree mentality. However, there was a time you felt judged and shamed. Your sister came home with a few of her friends and took out a photo-album. She rifled through them, and right in front of you, picked out a particularly ugly and boyish picture of you. She showed it to her friends and laughed. You hung your head, you wanted to hide. You hated your sister in that moment. How could she humiliate you like that? You ran upstairs, hot tears streaming down your cheeks. You forgave her shortly after, but ever since then something had shifted in you. You became more interested in “girly” things. You changed your baggy clothes to more tight and form-fitting ones, you started to care how people saw you. Maybe that comes with growing up, but sometimes I still see the eleven year old blithe girl in you.

I thought Diaz’s “How to Date”, was extremely powerful. This whole piece is written almost as a letter, or a warning to someone similar to him. He talks about taking a girl out, or getting her to sleep with him, and how exactly to do it. This work is very racially charged, speaking on behalf of hispanic men, and how to be seen as attractive, or at least-presentable. He describes individually how to approach white women, black women, and “halfie” women. He talks about how each of them will act before, during, and after sex. One quote that really stuck out to me was- “Take down any embarrassing photos of your family in the camp0-especially the one with the half-naked kids dragging a goat on a rope leash”.

Smith’s “You are in Paradise” is also a compelling piece. She describes going on vacation with a British friend- “M”- and it not being what she expected. She arrives in Tonga, and immediately feels allergic to everything. She meets a couple who won the lottery; they told her that their trip to Tonga was the first thing they bought, and that nothing could be better than that. However, it further explains how Tonga is not such a nice place for the people who actually live there. I feel Smith is describing how privileged people have a much different experience of a third world country than the locals do.