I always think that photographs express speechless energy that can affect viewers’ mentally or physically. Visual information is much powerful than verbal information because human beings learned to look before they can speak.
The invention of the camera gave birth to photography, and visual information flexible and sharable. The culture and perspective changes in photographs according to its photographer. Visual culture broadened and highlighted because people realize how people can perceive the same thing so differently.
Referenced from John Berger, Ways of Seeing 
(Chapter 1) (New York: Penguin, 1991).
Through the next 7 days, I will explore photographs around me (MoMA, NYC street and Online) on the theme of identity.
Identity consists of unique elements that characterize you, things like your fingerprints or ID number. Everyone is born with an identity but not everyone knows their identities well because life is a journey of exploring and get to know who you are.
So My journey started today as well. >>>
Day 1: I went to MoMA and stopped by this artwork for 5 minutes. “Kacha!” I recorded it down.
My Soul Searching trip starts with this picture because this picture demonstrates a balance between nature and the manmade system. This is Jimmie Durham ‘s sculptural work made in 1989 to express his feelings towards “The Cathedral of St. John the Divine”, exhibited now in the Museum of Modern Art. He has strong echoes with stones, “the stonework is… expanding with rust… someday it will destroy the stone.”– Durham. But from my perspective, the use of a deer head as media echoes with my emotions for animals and loves for nature. I have always been inspired by nature and animals, I have done many Artworks and organized plenty of activities to save the animals. I was glad to come to NYC because then I can boldly wear my style of wearing which simulates animal ears. I clearly see how our system starts to damage the balance in between, and I look forward to my future developments in artworks and concepts on the theme of nature.
Day 2: My phone screen wallpaper, one of my favorite “photograph”.
This is a random photo I found online and has been my screen saver for a long time. When I first saw this photo, it reminds me of a lot of things. The design of human with rabbit heads reminds me of the well-known Playboy pop cultured logo created by Art Paul, after reading the story behind the logo designing, I deeply empathized with Art Paul’s quote “I asked that the illustrator interpret the sense or feel of the story—what gave it its power” and starts to see a storybook opening behind this mysterious rabbit-head gentleman. Also, it looks similar to artworks of Kate Clark, who “blurs the boundaries of humanity” with animals.
Most importantly, it reminds me of my old lifestyle. Before coming to America, and also before going to the International school, I was in a restrictive Chinese Public Highschool system and my daily schedule is to finish a large amount of repetitive lifeless work. I want to make art but I had no time, and the environment I am in does not at all encourage me with my art. But I didn’t give up, I started to write a fictional book with my friends, to create a place where we can escape into an unrealistic world. Meanwhile, I keep on imagining myself as a character that exists in another world, this way, I let myself escape from reality-prison. Later towards exams is when I crushed and the cartoon world no longer can save me. I cried almost every day, and my loving parents made a choice, transferring to an international school, that saved my world and my characters. Mr. Rabbit is one of my characters living in my dream world. I thought this image mirrors the old world that I have thrown away.
Day 3: A photograph of me and my brother, dressing up as 1970s New Yorker style, on NYC street.
“Where are you from, where is your hometown?” My tongue twists every time this question comes up. My family is half German and half Chinese, but I was born in Paris, but I have moved to New York. So where do I belong? I and my brother have always been continuously discussed whether we feel at home in New York? the answer to this question I still don’t know. But one time, my brother and I went to a “secret” event in NYC where we take a historical 1970s train around the town, the dress code is 1970s new yorkers. That time my brother and I, for the first time, didn’t have doubts in hearts and no one asked us the typical questions. Maybe because we are just pretending to be? This reminds me of the article “The Classroom and Wide Culture” by Fan Shen. In this article, he argues to build an American identity separated from his Chinese identity helps him learn and think English better. Maybe this is the same for us, once we pretend or create an American Identity will help us mix into the culture better, and maybe finally feel the idea of belonging. The scarf symbolically connecting us shows our echoing identity as people with American-Chinese and German culture. Haha.
Day 4: Symbolic photo found online that speaks my relationship with Chinese culture for me.
QiPao is the most iconic and traditional dress for women in China, based in Shanghai during the 1930s. However later, people found out, Qipao’s design was rooted in China, but the sewing technique for its collar or shoulder sleeves eas inspired by the western culture. Qipao is still a cultural icon for China until now. Recently, a cultural appropriation event happened in Tweeter where a not Chinese woman wears Qipao for Prom and was found rude by most Chinese. “My culture is NOT your goddamn prom dress.” The idea of culture icon has become a stereotype itself and culture appropriation has chained culture sharing.
In this photo, the collar of the Chinese Qipao looks similar to a chain chocker that suffocates me but also looks like the human neck bone that supports me. This is my relationship with my Chinese Culture, I love and hate it. Many conservative thinkings have Indoctrinated into me and that restrain me sometimes from being open tp many ideas. But meanwhile, Chinese culture has also gifted me so much knowledge and ideas on Art and the world. my Culture is my telescope to observe the world, there are things that I can see and cannot see. I am glad I own a mixture of cultures, that way I take in other cultures and that may broaden my vision enable me to see things I couldn’t see before.
Day 5: A photograph I took of an artwork in MoMA– Hanging Crystal beads surrounded by projectors.
This is Joan Jonas‘s installation work under his Reanimation series, made in 2010-2013. It consists of sounds, videotapes that interplay with “color, sound and silent”, “prefabricated house structure” and shiny crystals. Joan loves to play with Multiple-materialism and reflection of lights. Multiple materials give the entire work a dream-like feeling.
Crystals always look different, shine under light and have multiple sides. I captured this moment, and there will never be the same moment ever again. I want to show how I have changed a lot, but I can never go back to the old me anymore. I have to keep going. Starting performing art has lit up my light and enable me to shine on stage, all these sides that I have developed constructs the me today.
Day 6: A photograph taken by me of a top shop on NYC “Street”.
I visited the FIT museum in the first week of my Parsons’ journey, and I saw this room-based work exhibited in the section of “The History of a Punk, Pretty, Powerful Color“. This work consists of countless found object rent from many girls to demonstrate a girl’s room in all pink. This installation view of Pink carries an imagined character’s life, the idea of the color pink in this society and gender stereotype’s symbolism.
I saw this little shop on the side road, and I immediately took out my camera to capture it although there is no photo allowed. This room/ space echoes with me because I felt a similarity between it and me, consist of all these things. This is a room that carries my story and identity with symbolism. Colorful, messy and characteristic. All the characters, animals toys, Asian mini sculptures, and funky crazy wearings fill the room. Imagining me putting all the things that identify me in a room, the room probably looks like this.
Day 7: An online image I picked for the cover picture of the first song I sang.
When I first saw it, it reminds me of pop art culture, of how in Andy Warhol’s works, he simply changes the color or media of a normal-life-seen-object and make it into unique art. Then I see the style of Yayoi Kusama in it with the component of pock dots in this photo. I didn’t know before that behind Kusama’s happy-look crazy pock dots, she carries a dark and unfortunate past.
This image presents the crazy, neon and cute colors I love. I love being unique, being seen first in a crowd of people. My dressing style has always been commented as unique and crazy or cute. I always get inspired by Japanese anime and love to become one of them or even live in their world. I love fantasizing my world and I believe in fantasy. This strawberry is how I define myself, unique and shinning. ( not narcissism, haha)
My 7-day soul searching has ended here, but my journey hasn’t.
Reflection
The purpose of this assignment was to look at how my identity leave marks in the real world, and the ways of capturing it and analysis it makes me get to know myself better.
I learned how to compose an analysis clear and structural but at the same time don’t ruin the original photo.
It’s important because now I have a theme that helps me specify my path leading to my career. But in the future, I will not have anyone or any instructions that tell me where to go and how to go. By practicing narrowing a pathway and follow it strengthen my skills of organizing as well as theme developing.
