Emotional Landscapes

Thinking about an emotional space brings up many mixed feelings. I find that places can bring about many different emotions, especially contradicting ones that happen simultaneously. The space I chose sparks more toward a certain emotion, with the beginning of a new one. Recently, I moved into my own apartment. At first it was a new experience, an exciting new phase in my life. The more time I spent in this area, the less it felt to be a thrilling ordeal. Living alone, I felt trapped and secluded. Maybe it felt that way because all of my friends are away for the summer holiday. Within this space, no matter where I went, all I could see was myself.

My apartment constantly reminds me of feeling trapped. It can be uncomfortable at times. The contradicting aspect of it is that recently my friends have been coming back. I’m starting to form positive memories within my own space. Although my mind is developing a more positive view on my apartment, the feeling of being stuck constantly lingers like a dull pain. These are the emotions I wanted to depict through my personal space piece.

After looking at Cindy Sherman and Stanley Kubrick’s work, I knew the composition had to look somewhat candid. The self-portraits were taken with red and blue mirrors. The purpose for using mirrors was due to my association with them making me feel trapped. The choice of the two colors was my personal opinion. Personally, red and blue together makes me anxious. It’s quite unsettling upon my eyes. These earlier selections within the process were to help when it came to editing.

The decisions in deconstruction were obvious for me. I knew that I wanted a more ridged and straight crop to images. Ever since I was young, I’ve associated any round surface or cut to be “cute and kind”. That view has just been embedded in my mind. Sharper crops are simply harsh. The facial expressions in all of the images are mostly the same, but the color changes the mood. The monochromatic red and blue images raise the feeling of uncomfortable anger or sadness. The naturally colored images convey the same facial emotion, but I find that the coloring refers the growing positivity of the space.

In terms of the photo-transfer, the first artifact I chose was a mirror. As previously stated above, I associated being stuck with mirrors. It would’ve been interesting to have this piece photo transferred onto a mirror. It would’ve felt that the piece was stuck within itself. After trying citrasol and a gel medium, the ink didn’t stick to the surface. The second artifact I chose was a skin-toned piece of stretchy fabric. The reason for this material was because of its resemblance to skin. I believe that our souls are trapped inside of our bodies. I feel as though I am stuck in my apartment, but what if we’re trapped within our skin?

Ultimately, when I look at the final product of this assignment, I see the layers of emotion. There’s an uncomfortable essence between the colors, jagged corners, and facial expression. Although many of my choices were out of personal experiences and associations, there is a distressing ambiance about the work that any individual could identify. Simply looking at the final image reminds me of the process of remaining in the space. My depiction of the area is as close as I can get to having an audience understand how I perceive that location.

 

Self Reflection

The process of this project was my favorite part of the assignment. I thoroughly enjoyed the research of photographers. It was even more exciting that as a class we were able to see Stanley Kubrick’s work in person. Drawing up ideas about our perception of a certain location was fun to understand how you view a place. Subconsciously we know how we feel, but it’s different to sit down and write out the emotions you associate it with. The most difficult part of this assignment was taking the self-portraits. It’s not comfortable to sit down and take images of yourself. Overall, I’m proud of how my piece came out; it’s definitely how I would visually represent the location to another individual.